I’m often asked the same question by leaders:
“Is this what you see in other leadership teams?”
What they really mean is, are our behaviours normal? Are the trends you’re observing in our team the same as what you observe in others?
The truth is, most of the leaders and teams I work with are doing great work. They’re capable, committed, and delivering results. But there’s a cost.
The cost is often isolation.
It’s not that they don’t get on well with their peers. It’s not that they lack respect or professional trust. It’s that something more human is missing: connection.
And when connection is missing, things start to fray. Small issues go unspoken. People stop sharing challenges, and when that happens, others don’t have the chance to help.
When we stop sharing our challenges, personal trust begins to fade.
And when we stop constructively challenging each other, psychological safety goes with it.
I hear it all the time:
“I just don’t feel I can challenge.”
“It feels hierarchical, they just want me to get on and do the job.”
Yet I rarely meet a senior leader who doesn’t value being challenged.
So I ask, what evidence do you have that challenge isn’t welcome?
Usually, there’s a story or two where it wasn’t received well. That’s fair. But those moments are gold dust. They tell us about tone, timing, delivery, and dynamics. That’s where trust and performance grow.
When teams invest time in working on their relationships, communication, and feedback, everything changes.
They start raising issues earlier.
They support each other more openly.
They align more clearly on what matters most.
The performance follows naturally.
This week I spent two days with a leadership team who realised that their real purpose wasn’t just to beat the competition or improve shareholder value. It was to become a mastermind group for each other, a collective that shares experience, expertise, empathy, and care.
When that happens, teams thrive.
If you’re not working on your team, your team won’t work for you, or with each other, to the extent it could.
Right now, most of the teams I’m working with are performing well on paper. Results are strong. But there’s still a bit missing.
And it’s needless to be missing.
All it takes is a willingness to do the deeper work, to surface the tension, to talk about the unsaid, and to rebuild the trust that unlocks true collaboration.
When that happens, everything shifts, from performance to experience to fulfilment.
Are you wondering about your team’s trust, connection and alignment? If so, what’s the benefit of staying silent on it? All of your key stakeholders will benefit from your collective courage, most of all those of you on the team.